It has come to my attention that some strange happenings of late may be related. And the cause may be the strange ladies who have been showing up in our community.
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First off: Little Larry (name withheld) was a perfect kindergartner who respected his teachers and parents. The "new arrivals" dressed as ordinary ladies were seen talking to the lad on his way to school. Other kids say they saw one of the ladies pat him on the head. Later that day at school Little Larry was cheeky during story time and pushed one of his classmates "pretty hard". At home he refused to eat his vegetables and farted loudly when his mom asked how his day went. I have heard his behavior has continued to be appalling.
Big Gordy (name withheld) also met the "new" ladies outside the Tim Hortons. Later that evening his wife said Gordy started showing her a catalogue and making comments about inappropriate underwear that she should buy and wear. Gordy's wife said: "The underwear looked very uncomfortable and some had openings where there shouldn't be openings."
Many more strange happenings that have occurred after people have had contact with the new arrivals. Some say they are witches. But we don't speak like that in this modern day.
Please report any strange occurrences to me. We must do something before it is too late.
One picture has been taken and the photographer paid dearly for his deed. I have included it.
Please help us compile a data base before its too late!